Biked home from Manhattan last night. The 145th Street Bridge was closed so I had to take the Yankee Stadium Bridge. The detour allowed me to bump into, Alice, a member of Red Roots, an arts and social change collective that's located in the South Bronx. Wow! I just stumbled on what I've been looking for, a local anarchist platform!

My friend Slavko says, "Pain or damage don't end the world. Or despair or fucking beatings. The world ends when you're dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man... and give some back."

My friend Justin says, "Once you reach a certain age, things like that don't even matter" (referring to self-conscious body image).

Thursday morning--at 4:30 AM--I was chatting online with Angelina. We wrote so much about where we are in our lives and I noted that all of my closest peers are just about at the same place, a standstill! She said that she felt as though the recent phase in her life was leading her to believe that she was living a life that was not even her own. We also spoke about breaking free. We agreed that it will all run its course and that everything will return, no worry.

Hello. Today I went to the beach, where there were topless women and scantily clad men, some in thongs. It was cool. I did not know that New York City had a "Euro" feel beach to offer, but apparently yes. That is cool. I went with my friend Javier and his friend Oscar. I swam and reintroduced myself to the ocean. The last time I had swum in it was in Puerto Rico for surf. I listened to music on the sand when I was not in the water. I have developed new taste buds for my ears. I can deconstruct sounds that I like now. For example, old New York disco/dance/funk that I like has electronic sounds like hi hats and bass drums that merge with organic sounds like congas and cow bells. That is just an example. I hope you like. I do.

Time and family

It's five minutes to ten am. Just got to Allentown PA to visit my mom and litlle sister, my little brother is in Florida for vacation. I really miss him. What saddens me the most is that Idon't know when I'll see him again. I have 28 days left before I leave for Cali and it has yet to sink in. As I sit across from my mother on her desk who complaints about my little sister being a teen and texting too much, I realize time is getting to her. Although she looks great for her age, it has left its scars. It's like a clawing machine and some get closer to it's claws--time's claws. And we're all getting scratched. We're getting older. Everyday. And not in the sense of aging and maturing, but more of the time passing. I lose track of time. I lose track of people. I don't want to, but my life's experiences have unfortunately allowed me to easily detach myself from people--family. It's numbing. It's the worst feeling. Although I'm leaving shortly I still don't feel any sort of anxiety. I would like to do something different this time. I want to keep my family. I want to keep you. I want to keep you all. You, my friends. You are now my family. You will be missed. So let's make the next 28 days unforgettable. Let's make the best bond that can be made. To a molecular level. I want to carry you all in my DNA. Unseparable. In me. You. Me. Us. Together. Without the claws of time.

...time...?

Time? There is no such thing. Its just another man-made tool to make his life easier, to cover fears of reality. Once one begins to accept the fact that there is no such thing as time and just let go life starts to unwind itself. If anything, time is manipulable. Things constantly come your way. But it is up to you to decide what to accept. The same way that time is manipulable so is everything else around you. Once you truly accept and believe that then you can start to control time and what comes your way. Time is but a forever, never ending present. You tell time how fast to go. You call those things to come to you. Its all a matter of letting go.

Still riding the MTA with my bike for free. Ask Patrick, we take that $2.25 and buy groceries with it! And speaking of bikes, I think we may have found a frame for Cupcakes!

This past weekend:
I had a big urge to shoplift a $23 ethernet cable from Staples.
I realized that I'm honest about picking up "sloppy seconds."
John n' Tiff joined the best drunken metaphysics convo.

what do i love?

i love rock n roll

i love oral sex

i love god in all his forms

i love domplines

i love alanis morissette

i love the lack of fears that i have

i love the lights of the cities

i love the smashing pumpkins

i love the beach and the rivers

i love to hate the war

i love sharing arts

i love the rythm and the latin blood. i love my sugar

i love revolutions

i love the consequences of being me

i love the satan that makes me feel complete. my light and my dark.

i love my cousin anyelina, my mom and my sister.they are my blood family.

i love my friends . they are my spiritual family.

i love cigarretes and lung cancer.jajajaja.

i love the world and its lies.

i love the idiot that i am sometimes

i love writing

i love being on stage and say r u ready to rock?

i love naciones ciegas

i love the pain, the bliss , the crazyness and all that i feel.

That's right. Cheers to busting out photoshoots at 3AM with your friends. And cheers to Javier for the camera!

4am Photoshoots

Headed uptown to meet up with the Rainman and Salobeans for the mannequinn photoshoot the two of them arranged. Three girls, who looked absolutely stunning and 3 amateurs in lighting, directing and shooting but couldnt have asked for anything better. Rainey got some great shots, always a good thing when you can work with the people you enjoy. Can't wait to see the pics, we'll post some here as soon as we get them finished. On to the next project! :)

Even Bigger Flight Delays! New authors coming right up. Welcome Pat and Cupcakes!